Today it’s time to talk about another very important tenet – perseverance.  Simply put perseverance is when something is worth the fight, so you keep pushing.  Mr. Lacy always says that what we do is not easy – if it were everyone would have a black belt.  It’s the hard work, the fighting for something important, that makes it so special.

Not to rub in the Hokie loss this past weekend, but the infamous Alabama football coach Paul “Bear” Bryant once said, “The first time you quit, it’s hard.  The second time, it gets easier.  The third time, you don’t even have to think about it”.  When you or your child come to class you are learning a martial art, but more importantly you’re working on life skills, like perseverance.  Everyone has their own reasons for refusing to quit, but no matter what your reasons are there is no better time than the present to improve your commitment to perseverance.

Recently my college roommate was diagnosed with Stage IV Ovarian Cancer.  At 24 years-old every day of her life is a fight to stay alive.  Words cannot express how grateful I am that her parents instilled in her from an early age the importance of never giving up.  When it comes to teaching your children life skills like perseverance there is no such thing as too early or too often – you never know when a life skill will be called upon to help save a life.

Today we ask the kids: What’s your favorite thing about taekwondo?

“High Blocks!” ~Taylor Hilovsky

“Kicking…jumping over the rope and jumping over the pole and jumping and kicking the bag.”~Mateo Lara-McNamara

“Sparring…You get to kick and all that”~Austin Trent

“Breaking the boards because I just really like to break things”~Grey Pearson

“We get to hit people. It’s my favorite because when I get angry I get to take it out on my brother and I don’t get in trouble”~Harry Pearson

“The forms because they’re challenging and fun”~Emma Cass

“Ki-Bon because I got a stripe today”~Ethan Stanley

“Ki-Bon because it’s my form”~Gabe Wright

“The high-block”~Sarah Wright

“When I get a new belt”~CJ Walters

Parents – what’s your favorite thing about Taekwondo?

Check out Mr. Lacy’s article, below, and more in the NEW Taekwondo America Organization-Wide newsletter!  Pick up your copy at the taekwondo school.

By: Mr. Robby Lacy

I never will forget the night my Uncle Clyde, a mailman, called my parents to ask if I would be interested in trying “karate” with my cousin.  After much anticipation the day finally arrived.  My cousin and I were the only two in class because the taekwondo school had just opened.  The floor was white tile, the walls were covered in pegboard, and the instructor was huge.  I will forever remember the first time I shook hands with Mr. Hoadley – my hand literally disappeared and I kept thinking, “This is the strongest man I have ever met”.  The thing I remember most though was his smile.  He was genuinely happy to have us there.  After the introduction, the class started with me being the senior student.  In those days there was a five minute break at the half way point (it was a one hour class).  After the break Mr. Hoadley asked if we wanted to do more and my cousin said no, but I said yes.  So, Mr. Hoadley and I went back out and finished class.  That was in May of 1977, and I have been doing taekwondo ever since.

Like all students that do taekwondo for any length of time I have had my trials and tribulations.  When I was a probationary black belt I had four “no changes” in a row.  I failed for every reason: I didn’t break my boards, my form wasn’t strong enough, and once I even cried during sparring because a girl kicked me into a fan (and I don’t mean spectator).  Finally on the fifth try I was successful in achieving the rank of First Degree Decided Black Belt on August 26, 1979.   My parents were perfect throughout this ten month period of not passing testing.  Not once did they act disappointed, nor did they blame my instructor or the boards.  The only response I got from my parents was “you’ll get it next time” and lo and behold they were eventually right.  I learned many things from that experience about myself and my parents.  My parents knew this, but I had to learn that if you put forth effort for a long enough period of time you will be successful.  Later, it took me three tries to achieve my senior certification in 1982.  To this day I do not fear failure.  I fear not trying.  It was this lack of fear that took a 24 year-old 770 miles from home to open a taekwondo school in a town where I knew not a soul.

When I was twelve years-old, my mom and I were sitting outside the taekwondo school waiting for my instructor to show up (he was often late) and my mom asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up.  I instantly replied that I wanted to be a taekwondo school owner.  She asked, “Are you sure?  How about a lawyer?  Doctor?  Policeman?”.  And try as she may she couldn’t sway my decision.  In 1990, my wife Jenny and I decided it was time to make good on that dream.  We started looking around Georgia and Florida and had pretty much decided it was going to be Jacksonville when I received a phone call from lifelong friends, Mr. Warren Davis and Mr. George Strickland.  They suggested that we consider a place called Roanoke, VA.  I had never even heard of Roanoke, but after one visit my wife and I knew this is where we wanted to raise a family.  So, on New Year’s Eve 1990, my wife, beautiful daughter Tiffany, and myself loaded up a U-haul truck and drove to what is now my home, Roanoke, VA.  We opened on January 21, 1991.

In 1993, several school owners that were in the United States Taekwondo Alliance were getting frustrated with the way they were being treated.  So after much discussion several of us decide to part ways with the USTA.  Myself, Mr. Strickland, Mr. Conway, Mr. Holler, and a couple of other schools created Taekwondo America in October of that same year.  Finally in 2000, Mr. Davis, Ms. Peck, Mr. Wilson, Mr. Deese, and a few others saw the light and decided that Taekwondo America was the right place to be.  In 2001, Mr. Emmons and the Florida schools joined and Taekwondo America has been growing ever since.  We started in ’93 with seven schools and now have over 50 spread across the United States.  Mom and Dad, I think this taekwondo thing is going to work out.

People often ask me, “What accomplishment are you most proud of?”.  There are two answers to that question.  First, in taekwondo, I am most proud of the seven school owners that I have trained.  Mr. and Mrs. Perdue in Westerville, OH; Mr. Byrd in Indianapolis, IN; Mr. Kesler in Fishers, IN; Mr. and Mrs. Abbott in Blacksburg, VA; Mr. and Mrs. Scott in Glen Allen, VA; Mr. and Mrs. Lindamood in Roanoke, VA; and Mr. Anderson in Lewisville, TX.  As for part two, I am so very proud of my children: Tiffany who is twenty-four and a second degree decided and senior certified, Bobby who is seventeen and a third degree decided and junior certified, and Luke who is twelve and a second degree.  I am so very fortunate to have three beautiful and wonderful children.  Now if you ask me the thing that makes me happiest, it is the relationship I have with my wife.  As Juniors in high school I saw her in a car next to me at a light, I waved, she waved back and the rest is history.  In October of this year, she and I will celebrate our 25^th wedding anniversary by spending two glorious weeks in Australia.

I named this article, Pursuing Happiness, because someone once said, “You are not guaranteed happiness, you are guaranteed the pursuit of happiness.”  Happiness is not something that comes easy.  It is something you have to fight for; or, you can kick and punch your way to it like me.

Every testing we have a special guest come in to perform a demonstration for the students and parents and without fail they all remark on how incredible, talented, and outstanding the performer is.  Why should you be any less impressed by what your own child can do?  Every class we bow in and recite the Tenets of Taekwondo: Courtesy, Integrity, Perseverance, Self-Control, and Indomitable Spirit.  Personally I always felt this was a good description of what it takes to succeed as a martial artist, but over the years I have come to realize that a very important character trait is missing on the list – courage.

Ok, your 5 year-old can’t do a jump kick without falling over.  How many jump kicks did you do today?  What’s that you say – it’s three weeks into the testing cycle and your child doesn’t know his form??  Can you do Ki-Bon? You wouldn’t critique the way someone makes Creme Brulee if you didn’t know how to boil water, so stop trying to teach your kids from the bench.  It takes incredible courage to get out there and take that first class, and your child possesses it.  You should recognize and encourage that rather than focus on all the things you think they should do better.  The next time you want to “help” your kid by coaching them during class step out onto the workout floor.  We’ll give you free reign to do so just as soon as you get your Instructor stripe.

What could you accomplish in 45-minutes two nights a week?  You could read the paper.  Walk the dog.  Do a load, maybe two, of laundry.  Drive to the gym, take a cycle, class, and drive home (once).  Go to the grocery store.  Watch three Friends re-runs.

Or, over the course of a year you could spend 4,680 minutes (78 hours) bonding with your kids.  In those same 78 hours you could lose 10 pounds, learn some basic self-defense, improve your mental clarity, improve your children’s self-confidence, and become closer as a family. Whenever someone becomes ill or passes away the number one regret people have is that there was never “enough time”.  Right now, today, you have that time to spend with your kids.  Put your errands and to-do list aside and take a Taekwondo class together.  You’ll be amazed at the benefits you’ll all get out of it.

With back to school time upon us, a lot of kids are going to be spending some time alone after school, whether it’s just for a few minutes or a few hours until mom and dad get home from work.  Here are some tips for kids and parents to make the situation as safe as possible.

For Kids:

1.  Keep the house key hidden.  Never let anyone know that you are home alone.

2.  Go straight home.  Before entering the house, walk around it, and if you find a door or window open, do not go in.  Go to a trusted neighbor’s home and call the police.

3.  If you feel you are being followed, go to a safe public place and call for help or go to a safe house location.

4.  When you get inside, make sure all doors are locked behind you.

5.  If someone knocks on the door, do not open it.  Only let those people in that your parents have said are alright, even if it is a friend.  If they still try to come in, call the police.

6.  When answering the telephone, never say that you are home alone.  Say that your parents can’t come to the phone right now and that you will take a message and have them call back.

7.  In the event of fire, or if the smoke detector goes off, leave the house immediately.  Go to a trusted neighbor’s house and call 911 for the Police or Fire department.

8.  In the event of an emergency call your parents at work, a trusted neighbor, or the police.

For Adults:

1.  Make sure that your child has a smooth-working key and that they understand that they must keep it hidden and should not tell anyone that they are home alone.

2.  Draw up rules for your child to follow while they are home alone.  Write them down.

3.  Go through safety rules with your child, such as: never open the door for strangers; leave the house if the smoke detector goes off, etc.

4.  Teach your child minor first aid, such as how to clean a cut or scrape and apply a band-aid.

5.  Plan something for your child to do while alone, such as school work or house work.  Do not let the TV become a babysitter.

6.   Make sure your children can reach the telephone.  Put a list of your work number and emergency numbers near the phone.   Make sure that your child knows that the phone is not a toy and that they should keep the line clear in case you need to call.

7.  Have your child call when they get home so that you will not worry.

8.  Explain the safety rules for answering the door and the telephone.

9.  If your child is followed by a stranger on the way home from school, make sure they know to go to a safe public place or to a local Safe Place location.   If your neighborhood does not have such a location, contact your school PTA to find out how to establish one.

Children are our community’s most valuable asset.  Safety should be our first consideration when we leave them alone, either at home or while they are at play,  We hope this information will help you and your child lead safer lives.